May 2012
2 posts
flirt flirt flirt cut cut cut
oops
nothing of note going on
April 2012
13 posts
i’ve been feeling a lot happier lately and idk :) i still get annoyed really easily and im not in the best mood now
well the girl i like likes someone else
i’m not too bummed about it? i think i only really liked her bc i wanted a girlfriend i mean shes lovely and all
and i would still date her :) but i’m not that bummed oh well!
sent me bible verses
i want them to have some relevance but somehow theres’ parts of ti i just can’t make myself beleive in it’s so dififuclt i want to believe in god and all that shit but i don’t believe in jesus
can i have my own version where someone loves me and is looking out for me but gets tthat it’s just someting i have to do
i went to tell you what was wrong and you said you had to go to bed istarted crying
i was so fucking close and is ent it anyway but it’s not the same
i just need to talk to someone
you
dad said he’d stop paying for my phone and things if i didn’t get a job i physically can’t alright
you think you’re such good christian people and you’re all fucking assholes who don’t give a shit about other peoples problems
he told you that i tried to kill myself.you’ve known for fucking two years. you have never said ANYTHING you’ve seen my scars and cuts and you’ve never once stood up or me when ANYTHING happened i hate youi hate you s much
you’re...
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME WE TALKED AOBUT MY PROBLEMS
don’t call me lovely i fucking hate it
i like being called lovely don’t say “don’t burn yourself lovely” don’t do that you fucking asshle i told you iwas going toburn ymself because i want you to stay and do something :))) you ahve such prboelsm oh god how iarare you gonna deal with likingtwogirls/???
i like...
cluttered
ineed you so much clsoer
i don’t think you guys get how nerdy as fucking hell you sound talkng about gods haaha
who cares
i found god when bla blahba blah i don’t give a shit you sound pretentious
in other news there are a whole bunch of cuts on my arm right now that are kind of difficult to hide people keep on asking if i’m hot in jumpers and stuff and i think it’s becoming more obvious? ugh they’ve gone past the stage of hurting and looking red and raw and nice to just looking like grazes and stupid and i just want them to turn purple and lovely again
i’m so unsure of my relationships (read as: friendships) with people while i was walking today i met up with a friend who i used to really close to in years seven and eight and we just kind of drifted apart but we’re still nice, i consider her a friend and she was crying because her and her boyfriend just broke up and gosh i just felt so sorry for her :( and she kept on asking my...
i remember when i used to say “i’m alright” and you would fucking grill me about what was wrong but you’re in the best mood lately so you don’t even give a shit
i’m in like the worst state i’ve ever been in and you don’t even know and you wouldn’t even give a shit! i have so many cuts i am practically fucked in the way of sleeveless shirts for...
ahahah you’re in a great mood so you’re not going to ask why i was upset all day! cool
March 2012
12 posts
i made a post on my proper blog about how i’ve been feeling lately and even though i included “i just do these things for attention” i still got really pissed when none of my friends paid attention to it!!! fuck
i have a heart attack every time it says ‘email: 1 unread’ bc i am the worst student imaginable i have so much catching up to do :)))))) i hate myself
i’m talking to my friend and she seems really upset about something?
we talked about it briefly but i’m worried something more is wrong and she lives so far away (NTOEHR COUNTRY) so it’s weird being able to distance myself so much
i hope she’s oaky
wow i’m pretty sure i’m being flirted with by the person i like :))) this has just become a blog about how gay i am but i really don’t care
it’s nice to be really happy and like someone and even if they don’t like me back i’m enjoying just talking to them and :))))
i think they said that they would make out with me yesterday? erverything is so good
i made a post about how i’m nervous about asking out the girl i like AND THE GIRL I LIKE REBLOGGED IT AND TOLD ME TO GO FOR IT
but it was like
she thought it wasn’t her and she knew it wasn’t her??? and i can’t ask her i know she’s bi but she’s all about that whole ‘i like being single thing’ and jesus i just don’t want to like people
i feel bad that we aren’t friends anymore and that it all ended with you hating me because i really really loved texting you at like 2 am and you being awake and you were pretty much the only person i could talk to about cutting
and i was pretty awful to you but you’re a pretty awful person
who i’m still going to miss talking to
i’m so stressed out lately because schoolwork keeps piling on top of me
it’s my own fault because i just keep watching tv shows and movies and when i have time to work, i don’t i just need to get on top of everything really quickly
[[MORE]]
it’s all making me feel like cutting
end a good soul that might end up going places
ifyoumakeit:
I’m afraid of the way I live my life. I’m afraid of the way I don’t. I’m afraid of the things I want to do but I won’t. I’m afraid of God. I’m afraid to believe and I’m afraid of all the loved ones that I’ve made leave. I’m afraid that my dog doesn’t love me anymore. I’m afraid of the social laziness that let Kitty Genovese die. And I’m afraid of the mob mentality that makes...
why would you follow this blog the point is it is out of context things that i don’t post on my normal blog bc it’s about my friends and shit
oh well
hello
stop talking like psychopaths and murderers are cool and you could just murder somebody shut up
it’s not cool to be fucking insane? god
my brain feels like sludge like it’s sliding to the back of its box